fourteen | oo30 [ voice // action ]

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oo30 [ voice // action ]

( Sokka | Locked 100% )

... I need your help. And you can't tell anyone, okay?

( Aqua | Locked 100% )

Aqua... I know we haven't spoken that much, but I need to ask you a really, really big favor.

( Sanji | Locked 100% )

[ a long silence goes here. ] ... could I stay at your house tonight?

( Luke | Locked 100% )

I'd -- [ ... ] Can I see you?

[ Xion is out of the house today. Mostly because it's become almost impossible to stay there. She hasn't slept for more than a handful of hours since Vanitas attacked -- three days ago. She's so exhausted she can barely stay on her feet, but better awake and moving than a sitting target.

Who could sleep, knowing that at any minute someone stronger than you and your friends could break into your home and kill you whenever he wanted?

It's this question that drives her to address Luceti at large, once she's got herself settled on the railing of That One Bridge. Hey, it's like right next to her house and she wanted to sit on a bridge, so sue her. ]

( filtered AWAY from Vanitas and Saix | Locked 100% )

What would you do if you didn't feel safe in your own home anymore?

[ and this is to say nothing -- not a damn thing -- of how she feels about Roxas right now. He had no excuse -- what defense could you give? -- and Axel almost died -- for what? Why? Why had any of this happened? Does she blame Roxas, for extending the invitation, or Vanitas, for taking it? Even if she had something to say to him, she couldn't -- he hasn't been home in days.

It's a very numb Poppet that's sitting on that there railing, swinging her legs and staring at the water below. Please interrupt her thoughts -- for they are very grim ones. ]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ smiles, because she knows she means it.

the question, however, makes her pause. right when Sanji asks it she actually blushes a bit, but remains silent, long enough for the blush to fade, as she considers. ]

... For now, just Luke. If anyone else really wants to know, I can think about it then, I guess. But Hermione said that the fewer people who know, the safer it is...

... Just Luke-kun, huh?

[ ... more blushing. ]

... um ... yes? [ WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO IMPLY, MADAM ]

[Oh, you want it spelled out for you?]

You really like him, don't you?

[ that shuts her up. Xion turns beet red, but ... any and all expression also drops off her face, and she looks down.

slowly, there's a nod -- and perhaps a lack of complete recognition for what Sanji is really getting at -- but strangely, she doesn't seem too happy about it. ]

... Is there a problem with that? [Sanji can probably guess where the lack of enthusiasm comes from. Still, it's a little alarming how unhappy she seems]

[ of course, there's a fairly simple explanation.

... or a complicated one, depending on your perspective. but it can be summed up with just one word: ]

... Riku.

Do you still like him that way?

[ "that way" ... does she really like Luke ... like that? she honestly hadn't considered it that way before.

before that can go anywhere, she shoves the thought away and considers Sanji's question for a long moment in silence. instead of answering directly, though, she says this instead, quietly. ]

... you know, right before the draft ... Riku and I had another argument. About what happened during that big experiment... how we were... married? [ wince. ]

After I got back... he tried to apologize. But it was the same exact things he'd said before... and I just...

I don't know if that was my real future or not, but... I'm not sure I want it to be.

[ that last sentence is barely above a whisper, and she shuts her eyes. moments from their relationship flash, briefly, though her mind -- their kiss in the rain after she was revived from the dead, how they fell in love during Dragobete, the many quiet moments they spent simply being in each other's company...

it feels like so long ago, now. like something out of someone else's life. and when she opens her eyes again, she finds that ... she doesn't mind, as much as she thought she would. ]

I ... I don't. I did, for such a long time, but after our last argument... [ shakes her head. ]

Aa. I see.

[She's taken a seat at the table now, rather than stand.]

You're moving on.

[ she lifts her head, though she doesn't look at Sanji directly, brows knit in thought ]

... is that what it is ...?

Well. [How to put this]

From the sounds of it, your feelings have changed. And you're not waiting for him to fix things anymore. [Regardless of where and when that possible attraction for Luke started]

[ she finally uncurls, letting her feet rest on the floor so she can put a hand over her chest. ]

... they definitely changed. They changed all those months ago, when he hurt me, and they've kept changing... it's never been the same as it was before he-- ... before he messed up.

[ shakes her head again. ]

He even said he knew he was apologizing for the same things... he made the same mistakes! I just... I'm tired of arguing with him. I want to just be friends, and...

[ she pauses, dwelling on something else. unconsciously, her hand drifts down to rest on her stomach instead. ]

He doesn't know, does he? [Said with a touch of frankness. Of course Riku doesn't know - she gathers her last conversation with the teen would've gone a lot differently if Xion realized the extent of the damage.]

[ shakes her head slowly ] No... I mean, I hadn't even really thought about it until now.

Can't blame you, in light of recent events.

[But still.]

... You'll have to tell him eventually.

[ ... heaves a sigh. ]

He's not going to be happy about it.

He won't. [And there's sympathy in her voice, despite all the ways the boy's messed up.] But he's gonna have to accept it. [Soft wistfulness]

Sometimes showing you care is through understanding, and letting things go, even if it hurts you.

... I feel bad, though. [ said plainly. the undercurrents are all there -- like it's my fault, maybe I should have tried harder, was I just overreacting -- but those don't get said aloud. ]

Anyone would.

Just don't think it's your fault.

[ silence. is it not? really?

"don't you think, if I knew, I'd tell you?"

..... Xion ducks her head back down. ]

[Excuse her, Xion - she's going to echo your thoughts for a moment]

I'm sure you would've done anything you could've to help him out.

But don't you think the fact there was nothing, and he wasn't making shit better on his own, says something?

Of course I would have... [ she says this reflexively. she finally looks at Sanji directly at that last question, and shakes her head ]

I don't know! I just... could that future really have been real? Maybe he really would have gotten better, over time...

[ she looks away, now consciously putting her hands over her stomach. ]

... I noticed something, the last time the Malnosso dropped me off. In that outfit... the same one my older self wore. It's like they were trying to tell me something.

[ a pause, then she looks back at Sanji ] I didn't have that scar when I was older. [ a little fiercely ] I'm proud of that scar. So ... whatever that was ... maybe none of it was real after all.

[ of course, she'd still like to think that Naoki and Richard get married, or that Sanji adopts her, but ... maybe it was just things that could be, not things that would be. ]

[She nearly insists not to give the Malnosso shitheads too much credit - but it helps. And she watches with some blend of amusement and pride as she talks about the scar.]

Maybe. Maybe not.

[balancing her chin on her folded knuckles] Either way, a "maybe" shouldn't decide how you treat your future.

... I know you're right. I'm still going to feel bad when I tell Riku, though. [ shakes her head.

... and then something else occurs to her, and she turns pink all over again. ] ... how am I supposed to tell Luke?

[ aaaaaand she hadn't meant to say that out loud. awesome. hands over her mouth, blushing harder, slightly wide eyes, etc. ]

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