fourteen | oo8 [ action // locked to oda_hates

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oo8 [ action // locked to oda_hates_me ]

[ This one is not so stable lately. First it's the experiment, making her fall in love with someone her best friends hate, but whom she ... really ... er. Likes. Then it's Sora, getting so badly hurt (thanks Yuber) he ends up in the clinic, and despite his protestations, it's probably all her fault. It has to be. She's tired and she's so scared and no matter what she said to Axel, no matter how much everyone is going to worry, she can't stay.

She runs. Again. Into the forest, because it's the easiest place to get lost and the hardest place to be found.

When she finally stops and sits beneath a tree, she looks a mess. All she does is curl up on the ground in a ball, burying her face in her knees, like maybe if she's small enough she can hide from the whole world. ]

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[It's only difficult to be found when someone's looking for you, Xion.

Which might account for why Sanji passes the exact tree she's sitting under, calm and relaxed and maybe a bit bored. The air around him is warmed from Eferin's influence - he's chatty today - and while the cook has picked up the footsteps of another visitor, he's not about to disturb someone else's walk through the woods.

So when the air suddenly grows cold and unresponsive, Sanji stops walking, confused, and tries to find the reason the Filial has decided to call it a day.]

... Xion... chan...?

[ oh god, her luck. she jumps out of her skin, staring at him like a deer in the headlights. abruptly, her expression just totally crumples. it's suddenly very clear she's about to cry. her voice even shakes when she speaks. ]

Sanji...

[... That's not an expression any lady should be wearing. It cuts and twists in his chest. Even still he doesn't approach until after a moment's consideration, and it's only one slow, non-threatening step in her direction.

After all, she might not even want to be interrupted. He wouldn't begrudge her time alone, no matter how much he wants to help.

Still--

His expression turns somber]

... There are more comfortable places to cry than on the ground.

... [ crying, sorry. she doesn't know what to say. ]

[He meant what he said. The cold ground is not a place for her to be sobbing. She at least deserves a shoulder.

And she's getting one, when he bends down to give Xion a hug]

[ dlkhksjdh gdit. she wants to stop crying, she TRIES, but this has been a long time in coming and when she can't bring herself to be entirely honest to Axel, Roxas, OR Riku, she needs some form of release. so she just cries quietly into his shoulder. she doesn't sob or gasp, she's never loud, but it's steady. it's going to take her a little bit to calm down again. ]

[He's got time - they've all got nothing but time here. His hand is making slow circles on her back while Sanji briefly glances up to make sure the reason for her crying isn't someone following her, as if that's the case there might be a murder in the forest.

Once he's completely satisfied his attention shifts back down to her, one of his arms giving her a gentle squeeze]

[ it's ... really comforting, somehow, to just be held and taken care of. she's never had parents, or really anyone who could do that for her. the feeling of safety is pretty alien, but she needs it so badly. she does, finally, start to relax in his grip, the tears slowing to occasional hiccups. ]

Sanji... you've always been nice enough not to ask when I'd slip up, but ... [ a weak laugh ] I think I need to explain this. Why I'm here...

[his lips quirk briefly at that, fondly]

Only if you want to, Xion-chan. [it's not like Sanji requires a reason to comfort her, nor would he ask for one]

[ smiles at him, grateful, but she's quiet for a moment, wondering how to go about this. when the words come out they're rather abrupt and incongruous with the look on her face -- one of calm, resigned acceptance, that tiny smile still in place ]

I'm going to die, Sanji. I don't know when, exactly, but ... I'm going to. I have to. It's just that ... I don't want to.

[She... that--

That was not what he expected to hear. At all. He can't freeze the blank surprise, nor the dark shadow that crosses over his face and mind when the statement fully settles in. The pull in his chest grows tighter]

Who. [Because there must be a 'who', for her to say things like that. The full extent of his rage demands it, maybe craves it a little, because then at least he can take his anger out on whoever made her cry]

If someone's threatening Xion-chan... ["I have to." his shitty ass. He will guarantee that won't happen, even if it requires destroying logic.]

[ she's ... surprised by his reaction, and it shows. she just blinks, for a moment, her expression blanking out. then her eyebrows draw up in sadness, but she shakes her head. ]

No one's threatening me, Sanji. The person who kills me ... it could be the same person as last time. [ that smile is back, but it's empty and kind of horrified. ]

I'm not human, Sanji. I was built for a purpose... and fulfilling that purpose would mean something horrible would happen. One of my best friends almost died, back in our world. I ... I made him kill me, before that could happen. [ rubs idly at one of her eyes. this story is always hard to tell ]

I thought I was safe after I got here, but... something happened. Now it's happening all over again. If things continue the way they are... Sora... I think he'll die. Or just never wake up. I'm not actually sure. But ... I can't let that happen, so ... it has to be me. I have to die. Again.

[Silence. His rage aside, Sanji is far from a fool. And it's the words, "I made him kill me." that strike home more than anything else. Enough that he sucks in a breath through his mouth and keeps quiet through the rest of her explanation.

... Not human, huh? Only the barest parts of his curiosity are prodded by that, except he's got bigger shit to consider.]

... And there's no other way? Or at least stop whatever shit's happening? [It's not his nature to pry, but in this case he pushes his gentlemanly rules for the greater good] This isn't your original wolrd; there's gotta be something you can do.

... no. Everything that I am... I was created to do this. It never had anything to do with my world itself. The only way to stop it is to stop me...

[ the way she says it though... is quiet, without drama or even much tone. she just sounds, well ... resigned. a little tired. ]

I'm just a puppet. I was created to duplicate the powers of my best friend. That's the only purpose of my existence. I failed... and I'm glad I did. [ there, a bit of steel! ... for a moment. ] I want to just ... be me. Xion. But I can't do that as long as I have the Keyblade.

Edited 2010-03-07 10:18 (UTC)

[The resignation does little to quell the growing hole in Sanji's stomach, and so he opts to ignore it for now. Later. He'll think about how to fix that later. Instead he hones in on whatever he can with subtle but determined aggression]

And why can't you just get rid of this shitty keyblade?

... it's not the sort of weapon you can just get rid of.

[ she holds out a hand away from their bodies, so that when the Keyblade appears in her hand, it doesn't hit them. ]

Once it's with you, it just sort of ... stays with you.

[And now a weapon that can appear at random. Their worlds, he muses distantly, are much more different than he first assumed.

Without a word he reaches for it, wanting to hold it for himself. It's a funny-looking sight, Sanji can barely take it seriously. And as if the weapon has picked up on his disdain it suddenly vanishes from his grasp, only to reappear in Xion's hands again.]

... I see.

[ just ... smiles weakly and banishes it, falling quiet. ]

[There's another round of silence between them. Sanji's not sure what to say, what he wants to say. Comfort sounds too cheap, reassurance might be a lie. Even hugging her again feels somehow less than it did five minutes ago, and fuck, how he hates that.

All he knows is that acceptance won't come to him. He's heard what she's had to say, and now it's time do shit his way. There has to be something to reverse this... And if that means spending the majority of his stay in Luceti looking for a method, fine. He can put the Filial mission on hold.

So Sanji wipes the apprehension from his face, finally pulling away after another brief hug, though his hands stay placed on her shoulders. He's... thinking. Because Xion looks scared and tired and still wearing an expression he doesn't like to see on a friend, never mind a lady.

... First order of business needs to be taken care of, he decides]

Oi. [he nods in the direction of the village] Come with me.

... [ headtilts at him, curious but willing. she'll get to her feet once he does. ]

Where to?

My kitchen.

I owe you a date, after all.

[ ... does he mean ...

hee. she finally, finally gives him a little smile, one that is not hollow or pained. ]

I... well, okay. I'd... I'd like that.

[That's what Sanji likes to see. His own smile grows and he begins directing her back to his house]

I'm glad Xion-chan approves of spending the afternoon with me~!! [aaaaaaaand there he goes]

[ g-giggles, walking with him without hesitation. ]

Hehe, you're always fun to spend time with, Sanji. [ pauses for a moment ... then with real feeling ] Thank you.

oo8 [ action // locked to oda_hates_me ]

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